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Talking to Your Teen About Depression and Anxiety
Anxiety and depression are the most common mental health issues seen in teens, but they can look much different in adolescence than they do in adulthood. Parents need to be aware of what those differences entail to engage their teen about their mental health and make a positive difference.
At the offices of Dr. Michael Kullman, the team diagnoses and treats both anxiety and depression in their White Plains and Pleasant Valley, New York, offices. Since both conditions often appear during adolescence, it’s important to speak with your child if you suspect they may have a problem. Here’s how.
What is depression?
Depression (aka major depressive disorder or MDD) is a common and serious mental disorder that negatively impacts how you think, feel, act, and view the world.
Although it’s perfectly normal to feel sadness or be “down in the dumps” for a while, an MDD diagnosis requires that you experience symptoms for most of the day, nearly every day, for more than two weeks, together with a clear change in your day-to-day functioning (e.g., work/school performance, personal relationships, and hobbies).
Fortunately, depression is highly treatable, more easily so if caught early.
Symptoms of MDD in teens include:
- Extreme irritability
- Inability to tolerate stress or adversity
- Difficulty getting along with people
- Loss of interest in personal or social activities
- Inability to concentrate
- Insomnia
Your teen may also have thoughts about death, suicidal ideation, or even suicide attempts. If they need immediate support, call or text the Crisis Hotline at 988, or chat at 988lifeline.org.
What is anxiety?
Anxiety is an emotional disorder characterized by feelings of tension, worry despite lack of an immediate threat, and physical changes like increased blood pressure. It isn’t the same thing as fear, but the terms are often used interchangeably.
Anxiety is regarded as a future-oriented, long-acting response broadly focused on a diffuse threat. Fear, though, is a present-oriented, appropriate, and short-lived response to an identifiable and specific threat.
In younger adolescents, anxiety often manifests as social anxiety, an obsessive worry about not fitting into group situations or not performing well in front of others. The group may be in or out of school. As they approach early adulthood, their anxiety can shift to fear about what their future will be like or who they are in the larger world.
How to talk to your teen about depression and anxiety
Teens may feel stressed by their parents, thinking that their love depends on how they do in school, sports, or other activities. It’s important to let children know your love is unconditional. It’s also important that you visibly support your teen in overcoming their fears.
Offer gentle encouragement to try out some safe scenarios that scare your teen, so they can learn how to manage their anxiety. Exposure helps them develop resilience when they feel fear or confront adversity.
Having a strong connection between teen and adult helps prevent anxiety and depression from forming. Though the relationship can be with a parent, it doesn’t have to be. Depression and anxiety come with a full plate of shame and self-blame, and teens who feel this may push their parents away. If so, a coach, school counselor, or the parent of a friend can stand in to help.
It’s also important to normalize mental health issues. Talking with your teen about them without judgment goes a long way toward counteracting the stigma that still surrounds these issues. Even if the teen seems unresponsive at the time, they’ll remember the conversations and know they can talk with you later if they need to do so.
Parents can also help their teen identify their feelings and figure out what they need to do to feel better. If they’re anxious, what do they need to do to feel calmer? If they’re sad, what do they need to do to feel happier? The exact path depends on the teen, but you’re giving them a good place to start.
If you need help talking with your teen about depression and anxiety, the office of Dr. Michael Kullman can help. Call us at 914-465-2882 to schedule a consultation, or visit our website for more options.